February 2012
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my fucking teeth hurt.
And I really just want to take a vicodin and make a bloody mary, and I think that’s actually exactly what I’m going to do. Don’t worry, I’ll have Mig-aisle call me in the am to make sure I didn’t Judy Garland it.
Sweet dreams, sweet peas.
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STOP HACKING INTO MY SHIT, YOU FUCKING...
I have changed my password at least 4 times and every time I log in some fake shit is posted all over my goddamned blog. If you’ve never witnessed me pissed off in real life, take this obscenity-ridden post as a mother fucking head start to start RUNNING. Because I will find you and I will cause you quite a bit of fucking pain.
I’m so aggravated.
And I want to scream and cry and yell at someone. And the person I want to do that towards isn’t going to hear it. Instead, Miguel will get it tomorrow. And then he’ll hold me and call me a bitch, but in a very kind tone, and tell me it’s okay. Because he’s a good guy, and because he loves me. And I don’t want to keep that to myself but...
Miguel’s roommate couple are breeding their dogs to have puppies (!) Aaaand at this rate, he’ll end up with one. Aka, in a few short months, I will have my puppy that stays where I only have to take care of him/her a couple days out of the week. Cantwaittt.
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I think she's ready to die.
“I’m giving up, Liv.” What do you mean? ”I’m done.” You’re throwing in the towel? “Yes, your grandfather is waiting for me.” Tell him he has to wait longer.
I accept death when it’s meant to happen for people, but I don’t accept giving up. Just because she’s ready doesn’t mean I am.
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Me: I miss being sick when I was like 8 and having someone take care of me. I feel like that but drugged and in pain and not being taken care of.
Miguel: If you were here, I'd take care of you, babe.
Me: I wish I was, even though you'd just call me a chipmunk and squeak at me.
Miguel: Yeah, I would.
Danny,
My dad asked me if I’d heard from you and if you were doing well. I told him I hadn’t but I thought you were, and I do hope you are. It’s most likely the vicodin talking, but in the chance that you read this, I do want you to know I wish you nothing but the best. I learned quite a bit from you, and for all of that I am truly grateful. I hope you can say the same. Enjoy the...
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omg I forgot.
Trippy dream last night:
Miguel impregnated me and right before I went into labor, he turned into Sean Connery and our child came out saying, “Where’s my submarine?!”
The scary part is how realistic that could be.
off to le grocery store
Buying gluten free flour to make a pie crust for my man, lovely thing that celiac disease is, some fruit for the pie and some sweet ass Naked Juices and more chocolate pudding.
All the weight I lost in 2 weeks from stress is coming back in the form of a nice high and chocolate pudding. God damn, I hope I sleep all day tomorrow so I don’t eat.
ps I probably shouldnt drive but it’s...
14 little pilly willys left.
And I think I’ll only need about 4 more. It’s gonna be a fun weekend.
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Chocolate pudding is brown, vicodin is white, my...
Just rewriting some favorite rhymes so they apply to my life.
Is it noon yet? I want another.
Just bought Robyn’s Robyn, Ben Kweller’s Go Fly a Kite and a kick ass 3 disc Soul Train set. I undoubtedly lived in the 60s and 70s at some point, this kind of music just moves my soul. I love amazon.
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I must apologize for my high school self.
When I yelled at all my friends for loving pills, I’m now on this boat with you. Very seldom and recreationally, of course. But several hours after having all 4 wisdom teeth out and I have several love songs about my sweet vicodin.
It is love, I tell you. I feel good. That and chocolate pudding, favorite diet ever.
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You looked at me while you were completely baked and smiled this awful, goofy smile and kissed my forehead. I asked, “what,” and you said, “I’m glad you’re here. I miss you all week.”
You didn’t call me a bitch once this weekend.
You kneeled on the ground at Wal-Mart and dug your head into my hip, biting me until I was laughing so hard, everyone was...
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Hello, life.
I’m done with school in 2 months and to show how real and almost-here it is, I got my stylist schedule.
Sunday - Closed/Off
Monday - 9-5
Tuesday - 9-5
Wednesday - 12-8
Thursday - Off
Friday - 12-8
Saturday - 9-5
Almost 3 and a half years of being a receptionist is finally paying off and getting to the goal I’ve worked so hard for. I am ready.
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Move in weekend.
I guess I’ve been way to sucked into the Hunger Games because that’s exactly how I thought this weekend was going to go. But we all survived! Moved Miguel into his new apartment in the west end of Hartford Sunday/today, with the wonderful help of Julie and Sean. Let me tell you how much I fucking hate those spiral stairs, though. I’ll have nightmares over them; I felt like...
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okay.seriously?
I have ONE go to password, and Tumblr, you’ve already made me change that. How am I supposed to remember all these different secret things? Christ.
I don’t want him out of the bubble we share. I don’t want him in the rest of my life. He’s the outsider that gives me great advice and different perspectives on everything I struggle with, but I trust him, an incredible amount. I’ll never be able to keep him in my hands, hidden from the rest of my life, like this forever. But I’m in no big hurry because it makes...
vom.
let me tell you how I really feel.
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I must have been 8 years old, it was shortly after Aunt Sal’s death, I remember that. I had been in the back bedroom at Grammie’s watching tv. I walked out into the living room where I had left Gramma watching her own television. It was a spring afternoon, I remember the light shining in through the picture window. She was lying on the couch, and didn’t respond when I called...
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None of my exes liked my naturally curly hair. They preferred it straight or blown out, frizz-free, essentially. So, it took me a while not to have perfectly coiffed hair for Miguel. The first time he saw it in it’s natural state, he called me his “wild haired coffee girl,” and laughed and aww’ed. My nick name is coffee girl. He loved it, and I loved that. Two wildly...
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I have this white dress.
I bought it last June/July, so before I lost as much weight as I have. I’ve never worn it. It’s the lightest fabric that’s every laid on my skin, a hot, summer day dress, for sure. I bought it because it’s so beautifully simple. I feel pure when I wear it, which at this point is only in my room, trying on different belts to cinch the now gigantic waist.
I’m going...
I need iced coffee, 60 degree weather, my sunglasses, a cigarette and Miguel’s arm over my shoulder.
I can’t wait for a full summer with him, we were both so happy all the time last summer. We are warm weathered peoples living in New England, for Christ’s sake.
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The Notebook: A male perspective.
Me: I'm bringing the Notebook this weekend.
Miguel: No! No you're not!
Me: Yes, I am. I feel like crying at a great movie on Sunday.
Miguel: Listen, it was a fan-fucking-tastic movie, but I cried three rivers when I saw it the first time. I don't want to cry anymore!
Me: Well, you're gonna.
Miguel: Bring Crazy Stupid Love, too.
!!!
Woke up to a very happy call from Miguel this morning. Long story short, he had to move from his current place by the 29th, things were getting down to the wire considering today is the 16th. And he was confirmed a place today! A couple with a 3 year old, Alora, and a golden retriever. They’re younger, closer to my age than his. And I couldn’t be more pleased. He’s really...
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This is why.
Miguel and I had lunch today. We always have a nice little bicker-and-banter session. As we walked out of the restaurant, I walked ahead of him. As I go out the second door, he reaches around me and grabs my right arm, turning me to give me a soft, sweet, surprise kiss. I was in the middle of complaining about having to go to work. And just that small gesture shut me right up. He pulled away...
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If I continue to read the Hunger Games at the rate...
These are sucking my soul right into it! A book hasn’t done that in soo long for me. Let it be March 23rd sooner!!
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I'd like to reintroduce myself.
My name is Olivia Rose Cicitto. And my name would have quite a few people fooled if they were to assess me just by that, a name. My boss always says people grow into their names. My nicknames, Liv and Livi, fit me better.
I’m a hairdresser, a true lover of my art, it’s more than a passion. I’ll be 21 in 7 weeks. I’m putting myself through school to accomplish my...
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Miss Allytn: We’ve been in the rainWe’ve been on... →
missallytn:
We’ve been in the rain We’ve been on the mountain We’ve been round the fire
Skin to skin In the salty river Made love in the shadow
We laughed and we cried At movies and real life We danced in the moonlight at midnight We pressed against back doors and wood floors And you never faked…
I listened to this song a couple of nights ago. Danny had written the lyrics out to this...
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goal weight made.
sans clothes, because apparently I usually wear 3-5 pounds of them, I’ve made it to my goal weight of 132. Now, the last few lbs are gone due to some horrific stress and lack of sleep, but whatever. Such is my life right now.
In the past ten months I lost the guy I’d planned to spend the rest of my life with, my mind, and quite a bit of my optimism.
However, I also lost almost...
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